I couldn’t wait to take part in Rachel’s Project Tasteless Holiday Spirits Challenge this week because….

My birthday, January 11, IS a national holiday… in Puerto Rico!

It is! I swear!

OK, so it’s not a national holiday because of me, but whatever.  It’s the birthday of Eugenio Maria de Hostos, a famous Puerto Rican writer and statesman who fought for Puerto Rican independence and the end of slavery in the 19th century and blah blah  (says Wikipedia), and it’s a bonafide public holiday and a day off school.

It’s also five days after Three Kings Day (or Epiphany), which is when the three kings and their camels quietly bust into your house and leave you presents and you wonder how the hell three camels managed to get into your living room, eat the grass you left for them, and NOT knock over your mom’s vases or the TV.

As much as Dia de Hostos on January 11th is my favorite holiday (because come on, how great is it to say “My birthday is a national holiday” and have it be technically true), it’s but a small consolation for having an early January birthday.  It’s like having a birthday on December 29, only twice as bad.

You see, we Puerto Ricans celebrate both American holidays AND traditional Puerto Rican/Spanish heritage holidays.  We do Christmas just as hard, if not harder, than the average American (and we do it better because we have coquito, our delicious coconut cream and rum drink, which puts egg nog and its sliminess to shame).   We do the whole presents under the tree thing, huge family get-t0gethers, tons of food, etcetera.  And then we do presents again on Three Kings Day (again, with coquito–that’s two whomps on egg nog!)

So, by the time January 11th comes around, I’ve received two rounds of presents.  When you’re a little kid, it means you have all your gifts in the span of three weeks, with no prospect of more gifts for another 11 months; and the year I lived in Puerto Rico, it was a day off school, which added to my covetous misery in that no one really knew it was my birthday because I wasn’t in class to celebrate it.  Oh, the sadness.

As I got older, this unfortunate holiday triumvirate meant I could pick one larger-scale present for Christmas, because that present would be Christmas, Three Kings, and birthday present in one.  And, while this was nice (that’s how I gt my first CD player boom box, back in the day), this turned into gift fatigue when I was older.  I don’t think I even benefit from the “Oh, I got you a really fancy present because it was on sale” post-Christmas effect–because THAT gift comes my way on Three Kings Day.

And we all know what happens when you get older:  you’re supposed to pretend that getting good presents doesn’t matter.  No.  Sometimes, like when a girl has a new camera and wants fancy lenses and lights for it, a girl just wants PRESENTS.

I think I deserve an un-birthday for real.  I haven’t picked a date yet–I always forget to pick one–but I’d say it would be in June.

And, if my birthday WERE a national holiday because of me, this is what I’d make everyone drink.  It’s tropical (like me), kinda tan (like me), both sweet and sour (like me), and packs a punch when you try to stand up after drinking it (like me, but not in the literal sense).

It’s my “I Get No Presents For Three Kings Day or My Birthday Because Of Gift Fatigue, But At Least It’s a National Holiday and I’m in the Tropics” Guava Daiquiri.

To get your drink on, you need to round up the following:

• 1/2 cup guava nectar
• 1/3 cup dark rum
• 3 drops Angostura Bitters
• 1 lime
• 1/4 tsp nutmeg, freshly grated if possible
• 1 -2 tsp. sugar
• Plenty of ice

See?  Like so:

And then, to get your drank on, do so:

In a small dish, sprinkle the sugar and add the nutmeg, reserving a pinch of it for later.  If you’re grating it yourself, watch out for your manicure. Mix.

Cut the lime in quarters/wedges and run the lime along the rim, then dip it into the sugar mix to create a nice lil’ rim. Don’t eat it all yet. (Oops).  If you do, start over.

Now, add ice to the glass, then add the rum, guava nectar, Angostura Bitters, and stir.  Sprinkle a bit of nutmeg in, stick your lime wedge on the side for squeezing.

And… bottoms up! Or rather, sip delicately.  And watch out, because it’s good–so good you’ll want another one–and strong, so by the time you make the second one, this is what it’ll look like:

But there’s no shame in that, because you can drink all you want–it’s a holiday.

(As for a meal to serve this with… Nah.  This is for sipping all on its lovely, fruity own.  But when I’m done sipping and I start to hear my stomach, I better see some roast pork on the table, please and thank you).